If its alright with you, of course

Am I crazy?
Is this weird to you?
You know... The whole - thinking out loud "thing"
I mean -
Im not scared to share with you my crazy thoughts - my crazy assumptions - my crazy fears and dreams
AND why should I be?
If you go back to my previous blogs - I talk about just wanting to be "me" - sometimes, I mess that up - by adapting, comprising, contemplating, being unsecure, over-thinking, over-processing, thinking your way is better -
AS IF
the grass is green in your yard
(its just a preception - I revisit)
I addressed the grass is greenier with my Beau recently
He quickly put me in check -
THATS WHAT YOU THINK
and thats the problem - WE think TOO (damn) much
Pardon me
but we do
we just think and think - until we come up with more reasons
NOT to do something
or
NOT to be ourselves

But, I see...
Talking out loud really helps
Because when I keep all these crazy notions in my head
they grOW
they GROW - into non-sense
that I shouldnt even been considering...
Had I really
JUST - talked about it out loud
I use to share ALL my crazy thoughts with my cousin Marcus - for some reason (I seem not to know right now) we are not talking anymore
It could be that its my faze or his
So, I write more (in my journal)
and I talk to God - who never shares my secrets
and I talk Ryane' - cuz we seem to think so much alike and Im not scared to be me - just dont know how to respond at times thats all.
Its almost the end of the year
its it around this time that we start to ponder what we want to do differently for the upcoming year.
Again, I say
I just want to be more of myself
Less of you
and her
and whatever He likes about me - is nice
but that doesnt always work all the time
Im not ALWAYS - this positive all the time
Im not ALWAYS - so understandable all the time
Im not ALWAYS - so carefree all the time

so if its fine - with you
I'll keep up what I know I can do on a regular basis

It doesnt matter if you get an A on the test - as long as you Pass the test

Your Patience is being tested when people are....

GETTING ON YOUR NERVES

OR.......

Your - GETTING ON SOMEBODIES NERVES

So What do you do?
Me... I get completely surprised by the phrase - as in WHAT? or How So???

Possible reasons:

• Asking stupid questions
• Not paying attention
• Not listening
• Being too silly
• Being cranky
• Confussion
• OR......... Maybe it has Nothing to do with YOU

Okay - thats it just a random thought
By the way - that's what happens when you think out loud

Sometimes cursing is necessary

Sometimes cursing is necessary (hmmm... that's a thought)
I actually dont curse (its true ask my friends)
but it doesnt mean I dont think it sometimes or
use subsitutes or
that "sometimes" I MAY use it/say it - just to show how serious I am...
Example: I aint FUCKING Playing (Im being serious, Im not kidding)

Im not sure where these words came from - but they are in the dictionary now so
- so many of us feel the need to use it,
on a daily basis,
with exclaimations,
and emphasis

So here is goes - My Most Favorite Combos:
Bitch -Ass (punk)
Bitch - Ass Nigga (Black Man who's a punk)

Stupid -Bitch (Stupid girl)
Stupid-Ass-Bitch (a girl who did something REALLY Stupid)
Dumb -Ass-Bitch (same as above)
Dumb-Ass (same as above)
You're acting like a Bitch (your behavoir is VERY unclassy)

Fucking-Bitch (I hate that girl)
Fucking-Hoe (same as above)

What the Fuck?!! (What you do that for?)
That was Fucking Dumb?! (That was REALLY Really Stupid)
I Fucking Hate You (Whoa - They really dont like You)
Fuck You! (Get out of my face)
Fuck- it (I dont care)
Shut the Fuck up! (Be quite)
Im gonna Fuck You up (Can be sexual or Can also mean that you need to run)
Fuck Me! (Sexual)
I wanna Fuck (I want to have sex)

Jesus - Fucking - Christ... (whew - thats so dangerous, by the way I've never used that one)

That's My Shit (I like that a lot)
Thats the Shit (same as above)
You're Dumb as Shit (Which means you are REALLY dumb)
Something smells like some Shit (Instead of just saying something smells bad)
Shit!!! (Instead of Ouch)


Im sure - I missed PLENTY...
Anyhow, in my opinion
Cursing shows ignorance
Cursing is un-lady-like
Cursing is not appropriate outside of that ignorant conversation you are holding with your friends
Cursing is for people with no vocabulary
Cursing does make some things sound funnier
Cursing is too often not used in it true meaning (hence, Bitch)

Fire in the Hole

I am such a freaking idiot! (LOL!!)

Does God work in mysterious ways or is this a dag-gone good excuse to get a new phone... Maybe - But I didnt want to renew my contract with Cingular - I wanted to be able to threaten them with leaving for a better cellular service provider (who ever that is - they all have problems)

Anyhow - This is how the story goes...
In my need to drink more water, I threw a bottle of water in my bag AND my cell phone. To my surprise the bottle cap was just a tiny bit - unscrewed...
Such is life when we make "tiny" mistakes

Its been so long since I wrote a blog - Im not even sure if this was "blog worthy" - but I wrote it anyway...

Stay Tunned - The Saga continues