Saturday, October 08, 2005

Im in denial - but technically Im out here doing dating survey's

Where do I begin...................................

I feel like Ive been dating endlessly -
I feel like I keep meeting all these different (guys) people & I am truly amaze...

Funny thing is that Im not "looking" for anyone- but dont you know thats when they come looking for you...
So far...
In my world

Ice Cream Guy -
This is a decription of a dude who is soooooo self endulged he truly thought I would fall for the - "I dont really go out" speech (not to mention I met him - out at a social event!)
An excuse - for him to want to entertain me at his house -
I dont think so!
You should see the smile or shall I say smirk on his face everytime he mentions - himself
everything he has - the diamonds, the furs, the mamogrammed suits, the 2006 coupe benz, how much money he'll make this month, the house he's getting built, the chips he's maded, the honies he's slayed... yada - yada - yada
& the nigga wanted me to believe that he wasnt arrogant -
He is the the ice cream guy - because that was his plan on the first date
- to spend as little money on me as possible
Now dont get me wrong - Ive gone out on plenty of dates - and there are some dates that Ive compromised - not really wanting the guy to spend lavishly on me
- but this nigga - needed to be broken -
and thus I realized after about 4 weeks he was wasting my time
& I kindly put his name under the "dont answer" catergory

Close to my birthday I had the priviledge of dating a Shy Brother..
He lasted 2 weeks after a sour first day...
& When I say sour - I mean the brother couldnt buy a clue from Vanna White or Ke-Ke Sheppard
I guess he called himself winning me over...
He hadnt been in a relationship in 2-years (red-flag)
& he wanted to try a relationship with me...
(I immediately put up - my red-flag - to save him from being disappointed)
Men ask me too often -
"what are you doing single" -
well Im shocked & appauled -
how else was I suppose to meet you
I laugh
Because that is a line - single men should stop asking
dont look for the problem
guess what - its a possibility that - I am very selective and dont have time for B.S. relationships

Back to Shy Brother - I refused to accept the gift he brought me for my birthday
- figuring that I would just throw it away
Im clearly not interested in a man - that cant be "the man"
(everyone needs a little shaking sometimes)

Ive dated two older men (bare with me - they were not that old)
& so to balance things out - I tried to date 2 younger guys
These little boys - dont know who they are dealing with -LOL!
First, one of the young men - who was referred to me by my cousin Fabric - asked me... if I wanted to order pizza - huh????

I said - no hun - I rarely eat pizza & if I did - I would probably order it for myself (by the way did you catch that Ima grown A.... woman- LOL!) so then I said - look hun Im used to being taken out - so I will go get some dinner & call you when Im finish...
he sent me a text message a week later - asking me if I was finished
My other young boy - is some what a boy toy (silly rabbit - tricks are for kids)
He has probably dated a much older woman before & enjoyed being spoiled sexually, getting some gifts, home cooked meals and not being stressed about where he was & who he was with
Me Im the opposite - Im not cooking you no meals - my vagina is not open 24-hours a day - 7 days a week, and by the way dont think Im going to be cool with having sex with you just because Im older and Im not tripping off of stuff like that, AND...Lastly - the whole thing about females being more mature than males - is VERY true!!!

Most women fall for a thug
But as for me - Im not an ordinary female

I respect a thug - but for the most part - a thug can only be my friend...
I dont have nothing in common with you & thats enough said
MY definition of a thug: making his money the wrong way

Mr Show - Off
Actually I have met him in different forms at least a thousand times
He is so cookie cutter & wants me to comply
Sorry Honnie - at this time Im not accepting applications - the position has been filled with reruns of - Everybody Loves Raymond..

Lastly - Friends How many of us Have Them:
Even though I could go on - I want to talk about the guy thats trying to be my "friend"
This is the best approach ever
because ladies - what can you say?
how can you shoot down a man that is sincerely trying to be your "friend"
Take notes:
A friend is NOT trying to kiss me
A friend is interested in what Im doing
A friend loves me for me
A friend is NOT constantly checking out my assets
A friend is NOT trying to sleep with me
A friend doesnt mind if I meet their mama or other family members - because that "friend"wants the people close to them to know who they're friends are
A friend is considerate
A friend is some one you can talk to about anything (including another nigga -LOL!)
A friend will be there in good times and bad
A friend has your back
Let me stop ....
You get my point!

I titled this blog - Im in denial because Im out here doing dating survey's because I realized - Im gathering a lot of information
(Smurf remember when I jokingly said we should go out and do some speed dating)

Im NOT afraid of a relationship that will offer me RESPECT! LOVE! PASSION!LOYALITY! and keep me SMILING... (& thats my 5)
Im NOT afraid of being hurt - it wont be my first and it probably wont be my last
Most things I was afraid of - when I weighed my fears with what I was willing to risk - it didnt measure up
What you are willing to risk for the betterment of yourself is always worth it!

p.s. here is where you always lose me - you say you like me for me - but you dont even know me


Anonymous umayknowme said...

The shy brother, that's me. And actually your comments about me are fine. Your entitled to your opinion. I can say negative things about you, but what purpose would it serve. Or it can be taken as constructive critisism. Either way it doesn't matter. You don't think I'm much of a man. I guess that depends on your definition of a man. Regardless I beg to differ. You said we had a sour first date. Why didn't you cut your losses at that point and move on? We're both adults. But you didn't you came over and spent a quite evening with me. Frankly I wasn't trying to win you over. Because I'm not desperate or un-attractive(and I'm very modest). I was giving you the opportunity to see what kind of person I am and get to know me. To a degree I may be sort of shy(until I get to know you). But I'm very respectful to women, and I treated you that way. In those two weeks you learned some things about me. But you didn't get to know me. And that's fine, because only you know what it is that you want. It's funny, women think all men are dogs or they're after one thing(maybe most of us... LOL). Seriously though, I think that most women don't know how to deal with a genuinely good guy. Anyway Hammani, there's no hard feelings(call me :) ), that's just part of trial and error in the life we chose to live

Blogger Hamani said...

Well... Its possible that my observations were incorrect

& you know me - I cant keep still -I feel like I have to see opporunity right then - or I find myself walking away - Im somewhat impatient...
hmm... Im still thinking about your comments & hopefully soon I can offer a more detailed response (one-on-one)

Anonymous umayknowme said...

I'm glad that you actually read and respond to the comments that are posted on your blog. Now I know you have no problem listening, as well as offering your opinion on a situation. I believe you already gave me a detailed response, unless there is more you want to talk about. (one on one)

Anonymous naja lady said...

I am just like you. I don't date thugs. I refuse to catch a bullet for an idiot.


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